I need to write or acknowledge someones husbands death.... not a close friend but a friend. ya know the kinda friend that your kids love and you love their kid and all the kids call ya both mom but you as "moms" ya never do anything with... you are always gonna but ya never do... but you know each other, understand each other ,and trust your most prized gift/gift's with ?? Yes that person I SHOULD talk too, SHOULD give her a shoulder, extend a hand. but i CANT!!! because i know it doesn't mater WHAT i say what i DO it wont help! she wont even really hear it . It will be WHITE NOISE like a vacuum cleaner or the music channel just alot of BLAH BLAH BLAHHHH. ~~~~ I know we both could drink some wine and cry ..laugh..feel guilty cause this is almost better .... be pissed at the waste but will it help HER ??? Will it make the newly formed scabs on me reopen ??? those are the questions and right now i am barely keeping me afloat can i really hold someone else above water?? i NEED to call her i NEEEEED to talk to "my other daughter" but i CANT !!! Ive started to a dozen times and i just fucken cant do it!! and this PISSES me off!.........................
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